13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God,” for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. 14 But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. 15 Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

16 Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers. 17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. 18 Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures. (James 1:13-18)

With every trial comes temptation.  When we don’t “consider it all joy when we face trials of various kinds”, we will fall into temptation.  A temptation to follow our own desires, rather than trust God and follow Him.

Watch the video below to discover:

1. The cycle of temptation
2. The deception of temptation
3. The remedy for temptation

<p><a href=”https://vimeo.com/202113663″>Women’s Equipping Week 3</a> from <a href=”https://vimeo.com/twcc”>The Well Community Church</a> on <a href=”https://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

 

Why does God allow suffering?

That big theological question we’ve all wrestled with.  This week in our study of James, we’ll begin to build a theology of suffering.  We’ll see James tell us in our suffering we’re not to run from our trials, we’re not to try and get out of trials, we’re to “Count it all joy when you meet trials of various kinds.” (James 1:2)

Douglas Moo says, “The difficulties that inevitably afflict believers have the purpose of deepening commitment to God in Christ.”

Suffering has a different purpose for the Christian.  Suffering produces perseverance and perseverance is the path to spiritual maturity.

Watch this week’s message here:

<p><a href=”https://vimeo.com/201237637″>Women's Equipping Week 2</a> from <a href=”https://vimeo.com/twcc”>The Well Community Church</a> on <a href=”https://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

 

This semester for our Women’s Equipping Class at The Well we will be studying the book of James.  For 10 weeks, we will study this book verse-by-verse and gather for a teaching time followed by small group discussion.  You can download the workbook here (written by Jen Wilkin) or join the class by signing up here.  Each week, we’ll post the live teaching from women of The Well on my blog.

Before we start studying this book, let’s get to know James just a little bit.

James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes in the Dispersion:  Greetings. (James 1:1)

Watch the intro video below to understand a bit of the background of this letter and answer these 5 questions:

1. Who wrote the book of James?
2. When was it written?
3. To whom was it written?
4. In what style was it written?
5. What are the central themes of the letter?

<p><a href=”https://vimeo.com/200405551″>Women's Equipping Week 1 – 1/20/17</a> from <a href=”https://vimeo.com/twcc”>The Well Community Church</a> on <a href=”https://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

 

We declared 2016 to be the year of the baby. With all of our hopes, prayers, and efforts, we were determined that this would be the year we celebrate an addition to our family. After a two-year break from meds and appointments, we decided it was time to go back to the fertility doctor. We had more tests done, surgery, three rounds of intense hormone treatments, three IUI’s, more waiting, and last week we found out our final treatment of the year failed.

2016 went by and we have no baby.

We were stunned, shocked, confused, sad, frustrated, and stuck. We’re stuck with what’s next for us. Where do we go from here? More doctors? Foster/adopt? IVF? Nothing? Move to a far away land and hide from everything? We aren’t sure. We don’t know what the LORD has for us, for our family, for our lives. The only thing I can come back to is . . .

Surrender

There is really not much more we can do right now than surrender. We have been married over 10 years, actively trying to conceive for 6-7 (I don’t know, I lost count), 3 surgeries, multiple rounds of treatments, lots of waiting, checking the calendar, hoping, dreaming, and nothing. While it’s easy for others to suggest how to “fix” our circumstance by just doing IVF or adopting, there is an entire aspect of grief that we need to work through to get there.

Infertility is complicated. It’s not just that “easy”. Grief through this journey complicates it all. We don’t know what God is doing and what He wants for our lives. We’re not ready to move forward with other decisions to simply get out of this trial or change our circumstance.

And so, we wait.
We’ll wait, we’ll seek, we’ll pray, we’ll hope, we’ll listen, and we’ll trust.

Trusting through this process is so much more than trusting God to give us a baby. We’re trusting that whatever happens, baby or no baby, adopting or not, He is still a Good Good Father. There is much we can’t see this side of heaven and we don’t want to miss what He has planned for our lives by forcing our will and our desires over His.

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4

This fall was one of the hardest seasons of my life. Leading and teaching through Philippians, having to stand up the morning after a failed treatment to preach the Gospel and proclaim Christ is enough, looking out to hundreds of women’s faces like a mirror to my own and declaring: Jesus is all we need.

Weeks later, to stand up after another failed treatment and teach on contentment. How nothing on this earth, no circumstance, no gift, no relationship, no remodeled kitchen, no Botox treatment, no perfect body, no bank account large enough will bring lasting joy and contentment. Only Jesus.

As hard as that place of obedience and surrender was this past fall, I meant every word.

Only Jesus.
He is all we need.
In Him, we are content.

There is no way to endure suffering, pain, disappointment, confusion, and grief apart from Him.

“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12

“for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” Philippians 4:11

As we close this year, with no baby, an empty womb and an emptiness in our arms, I can honestly say I have learned to be content. I’m closing this year with an incredible closeness to the Father. Nearly every morning during advent, He has woken me up early in the morning, long before an alarm just to be with Him.

My word for 2016 was . . . with. All I wanted this year was to be with Jesus. And although we have no baby, the Lord has given me exactly what I asked for, what I longed for, what I wanted and needed most this year:

Immanuel . . . God with us.

Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us. –Philippians 3:17

If you are joining us for the Philippians Study: Joy in All Things, this week we’ll talk about mentoring, discipleship, and imitating those who are examples to us.

Many of us desire a mentoring relationship but don’t know how to find one, we’re not sure where to start or how to ask.  Most mentoring relationships that click seem to start with the mentee.  Often it takes you, the one who desires a mentor, to make the first move. The mentor/mentee relationships that start out with a little bit of connection or relationship seem to stick more so than those that are connected as a blind date.  So here are some steps to help you succeed in connecting with a mentor.

Step 1: Ask yourself these questions before you approach a potential mentor.

1.  Is there someone you want to get more time with?  Is there someone you see as an example?
2. How are you hoping to grow as a Christ follower over this next year?  Does someone come to mind as you think of growing in those areas?
3. Have you prayed about finding a mentor?
4. If there aren’t any women that come to mind, have you considered joining us for Women’s Equipping?  Or joining a life group or team at our church?  This is often how most mentoring relationships are born, by connecting in smaller pockets within the church.

Step 2: ASK!
Pop the question . . . ask that person that comes to mind.  Share with them your desire for a mentor, how often you’d like to meet, and give them time to pray and respond.

Step 3:  Have Appropriate Expectations
Finding the perfect mentor is like trying to find a unicorn.  A mentor may not be your perfect match in all areas of life, they may have different interests than you, but they can help you grow to be more like Christ.  A mentor is not a counselor, a doctor, or a life coach. They are a friend who is just a few steps ahead of you in their walk with Christ and is striving to grow in their faith too.

Once you’ve asked, it’s helpful to:

1.  Share how you’d like to grow or what you’re hoping for in your time together.  I have had a season where someone mentored me in prayer.  I wanted to grow in my prayer life and so every time we got together, we prayed for an extended period of time.  Not only did my prayer life grow, my faith grew because I watched God move!  I’ve also asked a women in ministry to mentor me specifically in leading and teaching.  With another mentor, I gave her complete permission to call out sin/wrong thinking, and rebuke me!  When you ask, be specific with what you’re desiring in the relationship.
2. Set a time limit/expectations.  Will you meet once a month?  Talk weekly?  It’s best to set expectations up front so you both know how often you’ll meet or connect.
3. Find something to do together or a way to serve together.  I love going on walks, so often I invite women over for a walk.  I’ve also found it’s really hard to connect with women I’m not serving/serving with.  So for those that I’m mentoring, I’ve asked them to be a part of Women’s Equipping so that I see them weekly and know that we’re studying the same thing during the week.  It seems to be a natural way to invite them into a huge part of my daily/weekly life.
4. Write out questions ahead of time.  Don’t leave it up to your mentor to do all of the work.  Are there things you’re confused about in Scripture?  Questions you have?  Struggles your facing? Write them out and let that guide your time together.
5. Meet her where she’s at.  If you’re being mentored by a young mom, offer to come over during nap time and fold laundry with her.  Come over during dinner time and help prep, or jump in the car on the way to Target.  If you’re being mentored by a working woman, meet her at work for lunch.  Meet before work early in the morning. Be mindful of each other’s seasons, and be willing to try something creative to get time together.

These are just suggestions and hopefully helpful tips as you pursue a mentor.  As always, The Well Community Church exists to help connect people to God and each other, so let us know how we can connect you.

 

Resources for Mentors:

5 Mentoring Lessons by Heather Davis Nelson.

1. Gospel mentoring flows out of weakness, not strength.
2. Offer what you have.
3. Mentoring begins with prayer.
4. Mentoring at its simplest is being intentional to care for another.
5. Gentle challenge embedded in love is an essential part of mentoring.

5 Reasons for Women’s Mentoring

AOD Study Guide

Spiritual Mothering by Susan Hunt

 

 

Philippians is one of the shortest books in the Bible, but one of the most Gospel centered, full of encouragement and hope in Christ!  In fact, this book mentions Jesus Christ proportionally more than any of Paul’s other letters, with the Gospel repeated throughout.  This week, before we open up Philippians, we’ll look at why we’re studying this book and the importance of understanding what the Gospel truly is and its implication on our lives.

 

If you’re following us online, you can download the Philippians study here:

Philippians: Joy in All Things

I spent a few minutes this morning in my garden, pulling weeds. I could write a million theology and life lessons I’ve learned from the garden. It’s the end of the summer season, so we’re getting the little last bits of fruit from the veggies in our boxes. Soon, we’ll pull up what we planted last season, to get ready for what’s next. Which is essentially what we’re all doing with our lives and our schedules as fall arrives. Moving from one season to the next, back into fall responsibilities and expectations.

This morning, I realized so many weeds had crept into my garden. From far away they don’t look like a big deal, they even look green so it can be deceiving that they’re something healthy. But if you know anything about weeds, they are absolutely dangerous and harmful to the living plants in your garden.

It’s important to rid your garden of weeds because they rob your soil and your plants of important nutrients and water. Certain weeds such as nut grass actually reduce crop yield on farms because their roots release chemicals that are harmful to surrounding plants. (Seedlings Gardening)

Weeds sneak in near the healthy plant, steal nutrients, and reduce crop. Some of our plants didn’t yield any fruit this summer. We either planted them too close to one another or didn’t prepare the soil with the right nutrients. Then the weeds grew and took the good nutrients from the plants and they never produced fruit.

So it seems like the perfect time for both my garden and my soul to ask the question “What do I need to weed out of my life this season to stay healthy and bear fruit?”

Weeds in my life are the time wasters. How many of us are tired, burned out, or too busy? We say no to things we should be saying yes to, and yes to things we should be saying no to. We cultivate growth of weeds rather than bearing good fruit. We find time to scroll through social media, watch TV, or do other mindless activities but don’t make time for the true life sustaining stuff: bible study, prayer, and community.

Or we say YES to everything and then wonder why we aren’t bearing good fruit. I planted too many tomato plants next to each other and wondered why they didn’t produce a good crop? They were too close, fighting for too much of the same nutrients, which meant neither plant grew. It would’ve been better to have just planted one. I do the same with all my activities, I said yes to meeting with too many people, participating in too much, scheduling myself to the max, and wonder why I don’t bear fruit?

As I looked at my life this fall, some of the filters I had for my commitments were:

1.  Does this pull me away from things that really matter?

When you look at your day, your week, your month, where are you truly spending your time? Is your family robbed of getting your best? Are your weekends so packed, church or a meal with others becomes one more “thing” to do?

2. Does this pull me away from serving and connecting in my local church?

Are some of the things you’re doing pulling you away from serving and connecting in your local church? Are you saying yes to so much outside of the church, your neglecting serving and connecting with church family?

3. Am I only saying yes because I don’t want to disappoint someone?

Are you only saying yes to things because you don’t want to let them down? Are you saying yes because you desire someone’s approval?

We are all given 168 hours in a week. About 50 of those are hours are for sleep (unless you’re a young mom, then you only get like 10 minutes a night or something?). If you work, 40 hours a week goes to a job. That leaves us 78 hours a week outside of sleep and work. I actually wrote down some of the things I spend my time doing in those 78 hours (which did not match the things I intend to do). 78 hours. We can spend those surfing the web and watching TV or we can redeem that time, pull the weeds, and bear fruit.

This is a lesson the Lord teaches me every year. The importance of saying no to good things, to say yes to what really matters, the best things. The importance of margin and space in life where not every minute or every evening is booked up. The importance of serving and connecting in our local church, then serving in our community.

So my “yeses” for this fall:

1. My Local Church: Working part time for The Well, leading Women’s Equipping and shepherding women, gathering with others on Sundays, being available and present for those hurting and wanting to grow.

2. My Community: Working part time a few days a week teaching reading.

3. My Relationships: joining a life group: connecting and building community with others, and more time with friends and family.

The rest is margin, free space, dinners in my home with friends around the table, time to linger with Jesus, exercise, self-care, serve others, read, watch TV, play, prepare meals (bean burritos count), and pray. And of course, working in my garden—making sure the plants are getting the nutrients they need and plucking the weeds that will inevitably sneak in.

What do you need to weed out of your life this fall?

What do you need to say no to, in order to say yes to the things that matter?

How can you redeem some of the 168 hours you’ve been given in a week?

If one of your yeses is finding a place to grow with Jesus, connect with other women, and connect at The Well, join us this fall for Women’s Equipping Class. We will study Philippians: Joy in All Things for 9 weeks (Tuesdays 9/6-11/1 6:30-8pm or Fridays 9/9-11/4 9:30-11am). You can sign up here: Women’s Equipping Class: Philippians

 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:4-5)

 

 

I think I know why God gave me a crazy story. I think I know why I didn’t grow up within the church, why I spent 20+ years without understanding the Cross, why I indulged, carried on, and went my own way . . .

Had I not, I would have been a Pharisee among Pharisees, the legalist of all legalists, toeing the line, following all of the rules, and scorning those who didn’t do the same.

I may have wandered far, but somewhere along the way, His grace found me.

Lately, I’ve asked God, begged Him, to know His grace more. Somewhere, along the way, the woman who was forgiven much, rather than loving much, was beginning to expect much from others and herself. Rather than seeing myself as the sinful woman in Luke 7, I became the Pharisee with a stone in hand. Rather than understanding the story of the Prodigal Son through the younger brothers eyes, I started to see it as the older brother did.

I have seen it creep into my heart and my mind slowly over the years as a Christian. Once embraced by His grace, I’ve exchanged it for discipline. Once able to embrace others in grace, I’ve held expectations of moralism.

When did this slow exchange happen? When did I move from knowing and needing God’s grace, to self-discipline and attempting to live righteously on my own?

I remember the Apostle Paul mentioning this to the Galatians; those who accepted Grace were starting to fall back into religion, trying to keep rules to earn God’s favor.

I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting him who called you in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel— not that there is another one, but there are some who trouble you and want to distort the gospel of Christ. (Galatians 1:6-7)

Somehow the Gospel of Grace gets exchanged for the Gospel of doing, achieving, and right behavior with wrong motives. I claim the gospel of Grace over my life; I proclaim it for others, but do I really mean it? Do I really see Jesus perfection in me, or am I still striving to be perfect for Him?

It’s a hard thing this Christian life; having to repent of my striving, my toeing the line, my attempt at perfectionism, my high expectations, and my heart that wants to pull away instead of enter in and offer grace.

Brennan Manning says in his book, The Ragamuffin Gospel, “When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes. I believe and I doubt, I hope and get discouraged, I love and I hate, I feel bad about feeling good, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty. I am trusting and suspicious. I am honest and I still play games.”

I would add, “I’m forgiving yet I never forget. I love the Cross, but I still try to keep all the rules. I can show grace, but will do so selectively.” When I’m honest, my love is conditional. To the stranger, the addict, and the one who doesn’t know better: grace, grace, grace. To the one within the church who has slandered me, or the hypocrite, or the one who SHOULD know better: I expect more from you.

But that’s not how true grace, gospel grace works. Grace is not selective, it is not conditional; it does not run out after 13 years.

Let me ask you only this: Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh? (Galatians 3:2-3)

Grace, by definition, is getting what you don’t deserve.

So my greatest prayer these days is just that: GRACE.

Lord, help me know your grace.

Help me need your grace.

Help me show your grace.

Help me give your grace.

I want to know the grace and love of God like never before. I remember those beginning days when I understood my sin, my offense to God, and how sweet and amazing grace really was. I knew I didn’t deserve the love of Jesus, could never earn it, and it could never be taken away. I want to know that same grace today.

I want to need grace. I talk about my sin as if it were all in the past. It’s easy to share my testimony; I don’t live like I did 15 years ago. It’s not easy to talk about my pride, my selfishness, my self-righteousness, and my hard heart today. Of course I needed God’s grace as drunken party girl, do I still see my need for it as a cleaned up church worker? Oh how GREAT the need for grace!

I want to show grace. I want to truly be able to express the grace I’ve received through word, deed, and motives in my heart. I want to extend a hand to the hurting, to show the way to a yoke that is easy, and a burden that is light.

I want to give grace. And I want to give it impartially and unconditionally. Fellow partaker in the gospel who has hurt me, I want to give you grace. Outsider who has done heinous crimes, I want to give you grace. I want to give what others don’t deserve, because I have been given what I don’t deserve.

I want to gaze on the Gospel of grace, fix my affections on Jesus and His love, and turn around and give it away. But my heart is rotten, bent toward the law and outward behavior, and I struggle.

I want to live this life over and over in need of His grace. Over and over again, I want to be found by grace. And, over and over again, I want to give it away.

 

 

 

My word for 2016 is with.  Slowing down, delighting in, enjoying Immanuel . . . God WITH us. After all, this is the purpose of the Christian life, right? Not just serving God or talking about God, but actually being with God, abiding in Him.

Though this year has been completely different from what I had imagined, it has been exactly what I needed. For that, I thank God. I thank our Father for giving me what I need, not what I thought I wanted. That’s easy to say when what He’s given me is margin, peace, quiet, slow, friends around my table, and rest. Thank you for giving me what I needed.

But what about the other stuff? The hard stuff? The unknown? The doubt? The waiting?

Is God enough for all of that? All of those unfulfilled wants and desires; can I be content where He has me right now, today, with nothing more and nothing less? Can I be content without having it all figured out or knowing what’s next, what’s ahead?

Many of us want our lives to be all figured out before we move forward. But the way of Jesus is not figure it all out, then go, it’s . . . Come, follow me. Following Jesus into the busy times of ministry and pouring out, following Jesus to the green pastures and still waters to be refreshed and replenished, and following Jesus into the wilderness, humbled to hunger, to depend on the Spirit, in the unknown and parched land, just to know Him more.  Following where He leads, when He leads.

It seems as summer is approaching, I know my time of sitting beside still waters is coming to an end. I’m refreshed, I’m strengthened, I’m filled up. I hear Him beckoning me to the wilderness. Back to doctor’s appointments, back to high hopes and unknown futures, back to unknown, desperate, dry, barren land.

My initial step is to start running toward Him because I want to be WITH Him. But I’m stuck trying to figure it out. Why there? What will we do? For how long? What’s waiting on the other side? What if it’s too hard? Too lonely?

He invites me to follow, not with the map full of directions and every stop on the journey, but with the invitation to know Him. He invites me to get away, get quieter and go deeper still, to be with Him. What more of an invitation do I need?

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (Matthew 11:28-30, The Message)

I’ve been living the first part of this lovely verse up to this point in 2016. Now as we go back into the wilderness, He is reminding me of the second half: I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.

Even in the wilderness, if I keep company with Him, I’ll live freely and lightly.

 

 

 

In trying to keep company with Him, I know I need to get even quieter. So for the month of May, I’m taking a little break/sabbatical/fast from social media. As much as possible, pulling away from posts, comments, likes, and constant intake of everyone and everything. It’s too noisy for me right now. 31 days of quiet and Lord willing, the voice of the Lord amplified in my life.